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Post-Holiday, Grief-Related Blues!

by Russell Friedman & John W. James of The Grief Recovery Institute

Many people are rightfully concerned about the powerful impact the end-of-year Holidays can have on their friends who've recently experienced the death of someone important to them.

Logically, for many grieving people, the holidays are difficult enough, especially the first season after someone important to them has died. But many are surprised to find that the new year doesn’t automatically bring an end to the emotional pain caused by the absence.

In fact, it is after the holidays that the day-to-day reality of the now-missing person sets in, without the distraction of the mad swirl of shopping and family gatherings. It’s a time when emotions can get amped up and cause you to think that there’s something very wrong with you.

Rather than there being something wrong with you, what you may be feeling is the natural by-product of your attempt to adapt to the the very changed circumstances of your life. Learning to function the way you did before the death, while normal and healthy, is not always the smoothest and easiest transition in the world.

Ask John & Russell – Dealing effectively with your grief helps you guide your children in theirs. (Published 12/27/16)

My mother died suddenly, and I found her in her home. I have had a terrible time getting through the past two years. I just wanted to ask, how can I move past it and not let this event and all that is connected to it affect my happiness and the future with my young ones?